Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Join the Conversation - Say it With Flowers on Valentine's Day

By Mary Smith

Imagine having an intimate conversation with someone you love. Now imagine how that conversation would occur without speaking, or even writing. Imagine finding someone you'd very much like to know better. Suppose they're interested in you as well. Imagine getting that relationship off the ground without using words of any kind.

That was the situation in 1800's Victorian England. They had a very strict etiquette. Extreme discretion was demanded at all times. Romantic conversations, even in a whisper or in writing, were off-limits. Emotional expression however, will not be denied. People soon found ways around the rules as they attached hidden meanings to many otherwise normal gestures and objects. Flowers in particular were given special meanings.

As a result, secret meanings were given to every type and color of flower. Bouquets became secret messages. An exchange of flowers became a conversation without words. The way the flowers were presented and the way they were accepted also added meaning. Many secret messages were romantic in nature, but some were rejections or insults.

Tussie-mussies, small bouquets of flowers, became very popular. Using the language of flowers, Victorians developed secret messages that declared their intentions, issued rejections, and made acceptances. Emotions that were forbidden in speech or writing could now be expressed in flowers.

As the symbolism grew more complex, many details of the secret codes were written down. Eventually dictionaries and even books were written to clarify the meanings and to help people better create and understand the messages.

Over time, many cultures have used flowers to express emotions. The Greeks, Persians and the Japanese, for example, have all created their own flower language. The meanings change to fit the need of the specific culture but the need to express emotions with flowers has continued to this day.

Lengthy and elaborate courtship rituals were used in many cultures. Gifts of flowers were typically an important part of that process. Those practices led directly to the use of flowers in today's society, not just for courtship but for important holidays such as Valentine's Day, Mother's Day and Easter among others. These holidays wouldn't be the same without the use of plants and flowers.

We still use flowers to express our thoughts and emotions, although not in quite the same way as the Victorians. For Valentine's Day this year, rather than sending your loved one a simple "I love you" with roses, why not try a bouquet of mixed flowers with a hidden message? Search for the "language of flowers" online for ideas. Include a note about the hidden meaning of the flowers in the bouquet. Be sure to order your Valentine's Day flowers in advance to ensure a timely delivery. - 16003

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